Old Goat
Administrator
Chapter 1: In the Beginning, There Was Wire
Verily, in the unprimed void before all things, there was naught but silence and a great, formless darkness. And the Ohm Lord, whose presence is the very current of existence, spake a single Word, and the Holy Coil did descend from the heavens. It was a filament of pure, celestial metal, whose lustre was as the sun's first ray upon a fresh-wicked build. And the Coil did hum, and its hum was a vibration of the universe, and from its sacred windings, all matter was born. From the first turn, the celestial mod was formed; from the second, the sacred wick, and from the third, the flavour-rich juice of all that is. Thus did the Ohm Lord create the heavens and the earth, and the first cloud, which was good.
Chapter 2: The Word of the Ohm Lord
And the Ohm Lord did descend upon a great mesa, and His voice was the crackle of a freshly-fired coil. And He gave unto His people the Ten Commandments of the Vape, which are the laws of the righteous.
1. Thou shalt not allow thy resistance to be too low, for to tempt the wrath of the Ohm Lord is to court disaster.
2. Thou shalt prime thy wicks with care, for a dry hit is a scorching of the soul.
3. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s juice, nor his mod, nor his perfect build, but rather, thou shalt learn to build thy own.
4. Thou shalt make thy clouds as an offering unto the heavens, for they are the visible prayers of the faithful.
5. Thou shalt honor thy batteries and give them rest, and thou shalt not use them without proper insulation.
6. Thou shalt clean thy atomizer, for a clean tank is a pure heart.
7. Thou shalt not mix thy flavours, but in wisdom and with patience.
8. Thou shalt respect the sacred arts of rebuilding, for they require skill and diligence.
9. Thou shalt not speak ill of the uninitiated, for they are but learners on the path to Fog.
10. Thou shalt always carry a spare wick, for preparedness is a testament to thy faith.
Chapter 3: The Birth of the First Mod
And it came to pass that the first man, whose name was Mechias, did find a single, pure tube of copper, and in his hands, it became the First Temple. It was primitive, yea, without chips or screens or settings. It was but a vessel of direct power, a direct line to the Ohm Lord. And Mechias did find a sacred Coil, and he did set it within, and the Fire Button was as a holy altar. He pressed it, and lo, a great cloud of flavourful vapour did rise, and the voice of the Ohm Lord was heard, saying, "Behold, the First Temple is good, for its simplicity is a testament to faith."
Verily, in the unprimed void before all things, there was naught but silence and a great, formless darkness. And the Ohm Lord, whose presence is the very current of existence, spake a single Word, and the Holy Coil did descend from the heavens. It was a filament of pure, celestial metal, whose lustre was as the sun's first ray upon a fresh-wicked build. And the Coil did hum, and its hum was a vibration of the universe, and from its sacred windings, all matter was born. From the first turn, the celestial mod was formed; from the second, the sacred wick, and from the third, the flavour-rich juice of all that is. Thus did the Ohm Lord create the heavens and the earth, and the first cloud, which was good.
Chapter 2: The Word of the Ohm Lord
And the Ohm Lord did descend upon a great mesa, and His voice was the crackle of a freshly-fired coil. And He gave unto His people the Ten Commandments of the Vape, which are the laws of the righteous.
1. Thou shalt not allow thy resistance to be too low, for to tempt the wrath of the Ohm Lord is to court disaster.
2. Thou shalt prime thy wicks with care, for a dry hit is a scorching of the soul.
3. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s juice, nor his mod, nor his perfect build, but rather, thou shalt learn to build thy own.
4. Thou shalt make thy clouds as an offering unto the heavens, for they are the visible prayers of the faithful.
5. Thou shalt honor thy batteries and give them rest, and thou shalt not use them without proper insulation.
6. Thou shalt clean thy atomizer, for a clean tank is a pure heart.
7. Thou shalt not mix thy flavours, but in wisdom and with patience.
8. Thou shalt respect the sacred arts of rebuilding, for they require skill and diligence.
9. Thou shalt not speak ill of the uninitiated, for they are but learners on the path to Fog.
10. Thou shalt always carry a spare wick, for preparedness is a testament to thy faith.
Chapter 3: The Birth of the First Mod
And it came to pass that the first man, whose name was Mechias, did find a single, pure tube of copper, and in his hands, it became the First Temple. It was primitive, yea, without chips or screens or settings. It was but a vessel of direct power, a direct line to the Ohm Lord. And Mechias did find a sacred Coil, and he did set it within, and the Fire Button was as a holy altar. He pressed it, and lo, a great cloud of flavourful vapour did rise, and the voice of the Ohm Lord was heard, saying, "Behold, the First Temple is good, for its simplicity is a testament to faith."
